Twardoski, Jennifer. "Things to Keep in Mind When Healing After Divorce or Breakup." Huffington Post (2016). huffingtonpost.com.
The night is young and so are you, so don’t let a moment go to waste, unless you want to be Elle Varner and start asking the universe for a refill on its time. At this age, it is important that we as young adults are setting ourselves up nicely for the future. Of course, this will consist of much trial and error. However, it is not your trials that should define you. It’s how you respond to said trials; how you overcome them. Phrased differently, it’s how you finally cross that bridge over troubled water. Rebellious Woman is a blog dedicated to the “Mo’s Mix Series,” but, like the novel, the blog will have many functions, one of those being healing.
The “Mo’s Mix” series consists of a lot of healing: Monique healing from her personal dilemmas like perfectionism, Andre healing from his identity crisis, Camille healing from abuse, Laila healing from betrayal, James healing from insincerity, and Daniel healing from his internalized hatred.
Healing was an important function in the novel because of the emotional environment when I wrote it. At the time of publishing the first book, Mo’s Mix, there was a lot going on. For one, I had recently finished my freshman year of college and that was a huge trial. I can’t count the number of times I had cried in my dorm room. Throughout that year, my diary was my best friend. Well, that and the novel I was conjuring on my computer. My poem "It Might Just Be Rocket Science” goes into detail about my experiences as a freshman.
Photo creds: "Natural Hair Art." Pinterest.
Then, I was going through the transition phase with my hair. I’ve had to do a lot of self-motivating when it comes to my hair. This is due in part to not only how society teaches us that 4C hair is degenerative but also lessons we internalize. Before, I was young and impressionable and accepted the dogma that my natural hair was ugly, but I have learned to move past that problematic mindset.
Finally, I went through a breakup. It was my second longest relationship, so the breakup hit me hard. Now, nearly 2 years later, I am still healing from that wound as well as another wound. I called this first blog “Muscle Memory” because, just like our muscles will remember the moves to a dance after much practice, we can learn to love ourselves with a little bit of practice. We can heal. As you take this journey with Rebellious Woman, keep these encouraging words in mind. They come from a poem of mine, called Naked Eye:
Finding her was making
How do you heal? Comment below.
The "Rebellious Woman" blog is a periodic scoop on hair, love, race, politics, and everything in between. Stay tuned for reflections the life of a rebel with a cause!